So I was having a conversation with someone the other day, and I was inspired to share some of my story. There's a bit more to it, but this is the jist of it.

My mom used to have to drag me to church when I was going through this rebellious stage, I had gone thru some stuff that I wouldn't wish on anyone and I was mad at everyone and everything. So I used to fall asleep on the benches, and go home and listen to wordly music, and do whatever I wanted, things I shouldn't have done and things that I am ashamed of. My mom tried, and I got more rebellious because I didn't want anyone to force me to do something I didn't want to do, I wanted to have my own experience. And the devil kept lying to me, trying to use the pain of my past to hold me down :/ But looking back, it wasn't worth it. It wasn't worth the dissapointments and the heartbreaks, and oh the setbacks! I guess one day I realized going out full force into the world just wasn't worth it. And I've tripped up and fell out on my face more times than I can count, but when I found my refuge in God, I knew that even with the battles and situations and trials that lifted up, I couldn't keep running from God, because He's the only one who has been there for me, who has healed me, and has made me whole again. And even now, when I make my mistakes, He forgives me. I've discovered God's love, I found it when I wasn't looking... Once, I was crying in my room, I had the house to myself, so I was bawling my eyes out, over a boy. And I said "God!! Why is it that I give him all of my love, I forgive him when he doesn't talk to me the way he should, and I help him even when he doesn't want me around, and when he tries to avoid me, I try to get his attention and show him that I'm here for him...how could someone reject the love that someone gives them?????? HOW???" Then, I heard in a whisper, a peaceful voice that said: "Now you know how I feel.." I realized I had been ignoring God, and He had taught me something. From that day on, my life hasn't been the same

Insert clever title here

Hey to all you bloggers out there. And to whoever is reading this. Thank you for taking the time out to pass by and read this. :-) its nothing special, really. its just my own litle space in this huge place, this alternate reality in a way called the internet. I ask myself sometimes, what my reason is behind having a blog. And i know now i can honestly say its because i want to share what I've learned with everyone else out there. I had a reason as to why I was going to post something, but I think praying about things will prove to be more productive and effective. the prayers of the righteous availeth much!! thats not just a song by Israel and New Breed by the way, theres a verse in the Bible in the book of James chapter 5 if im not mistaken. anyway, i guess this will serve as an appropriate update. thats all for now i will write more soon God willing....good night all :-)

I don't get it

I don't get it.
I don't get why we don't see the tragedy that is killing us all slowly, stripping us of our purpose, cutting us off from living longer.
I don't get why we can say that it's wrong to do something, yet we are lacking in love, in hope, and in peace.
I don't get why time and time again, while there are millions around the world starving, we complain about how much sleep we weren't able to get in our nice warm beds.

I don't get it.

I don't understand why amidst a war that has been going on, soldiers die for their country,yet on a daily basis, thousands of innocent lives die before they had the chance to live.
I don't get it.
I don't understand that while all this is going on, we are arguing amongst ourselves.
I don't get it.
I don't get it.
I don't get it.

I don't get why we say "freedom of religion", when as each day goes by, it becomes more like:
"freedom of all religions....except Christianity".
I don't understand that while a person is living, they are despised and few support them, yet once they depart from this earth, everyone celebrates their existence.
I don't get it.
I don't understand why people support Martin Luther King Jr, and "everything he stood for", yet when we point out he was a man of faith, a man of God, people say that what he believed in had nothing to do with it.
It had everything to do with it.
I don't get why people say that religion hardens hearts and enslaves minds,
when the greatest minds this world has ever seen were men and women of God.
But I don't get it.
I don't get why during the Holiday season, we have to say "Happy Holidays", yet two months earlier, everyone says "Happy Hallloween".
Merry Christmas, I say.
I don't get it.
I don't understand why on that cross, He said 'Father, forgive them. For they know not what they do',
yet we continue to do it anyway. . .

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."
-John 3:16


I think I get it now. . .

Sometimes, you've gotta be childish!!

So I'm sitting here in front of the computer screen asking myself "hmm, why haven't I written a blog in 2 months?" And then it dawned on me: because I haven't! Lol. And on that note, I decided to write something, so here I am. Question is, what am I going to write about? That's the thing with these websites, the sole purpose is to express yourself, vent in a way. However there are certain precautions one must take before writing anything and showing it to the world, you've gotta find a balance. That is, when it comes to writing personal things which is what most people tend to do. Unless you're sharing the Gospel, which to me, you shouldn't leave anything out. In fact there's so much to learn, so much to know about God that you pretty much have to share as much as you can as fast as you can. Christ is coming soon, people! Wake up!

I remember yesterday at work, a few of the kids came up to me throughout the course of my shift and were asking me if I was going to the rollerskating rink (My job was having a field trip with all the kids and were taking them out for a few hours; the rollerskating rink was their destination). And what really got me, was how many kids remembered that I wasn't going with them and why. It went something like this:

Kid: Hey Sol, you're not going to rollerworld with us?
Me: No, I can't it's friday
Kid: Ohhh right...you go to church on fridays I forgot
*KID WALKS AWAY*

Kid: Solmaria, how come you're not going to rollerworld??
Me: Well, I have church tonight
Kid: Oh yeaaa it's friday...but don't you wanna have fun?!?!
Me: Yes, and that's why I'm going to church. I have more fun worshipping God than anything else
Kid: yea, but..
Me: Listen! When Jesus comes to get His people, rollerworld is
staying behind, so you better believe that I gotta be ready at all times!
Kid: Huh? But I go to church
Other kid: Yeah, but she's a REAL Christian (I'm laughing at this point because this kids are unbelievable lol)
Me: Anyways, God is more important than rollerworld, I have church tonight, that's it.

So that was pretty much how my day went from the time I went til the time I left. It was crazy though, stuff like that happens so often where I work, sometimes we forget how much kids remember and how thoughtful they really are. Another thing that gets me, is no matter how defensive or aggressive a child gets, a child is still a child. They'll come up to you crying that somebody else pushed them or something, or they'll be excited that they got a 90 on an assignment in school that day, or they'll just do something totally unexpected that reminds you that they're still a kid. No matter how much of an adult a child will try to act, they'll do something simple that still implies that they're still growing, still learning, still trying to understand the world around them.

The Bible says that we have to be like children to enter the kingdom of heaven. And sometimes I ask myself, what does that really mean? There's so much we can learn from children, it's amazing. For one, how genuine they are. They'll come up to you and give you one of those hugs that even if you're having the worst day ever, you know things will be alright. They love from the heart, they put their trust in adults so much. If something is bothering them, they won't hide it, they'll let you know when they're upset! And if they've done something wrong, they'll come up to you and apologize for whatever it is they've done, and the next minute they're smiling and happy. I feel like that's one of the ways that God wants us to be like children, He wants us to be real, to be genuine and express ourselves to Him. To be able to tell Him "God, I don't like this!", whatever it may be...and to come into His presence and embrace Him, tell Him how much we love Him, how much we put our trust in Him, and how much He means to us.

I love God!!! =)

"You don't understand" part 2

You see, what I wanted to say with that is this: that it doesn't matter what you're going through or how you're feeling, God is bigger than your problem. In the times that we feel that we can't go on, those are the times where we need God the most, to help us through it all. God lets us know through the Bible, that His grace is enough! That His power is made PERFECT in our weakness (2 Cor.12:9). In other words, when we are weak, we recognize how much we cannot simply depend on ourselves. Sometimes we get a little comfortable, and things have to get shook up for us to realize that we haven't "made it" yet. There is more to accomplish, so much more. That God desires a whole man, not just a fraction. He wants us to give Him everything, why not let Him in? You might be asking yourself "wait a sec, God is God, can't he just do it?" Well my friend, God is a gentleman, and He's not gonna barge in uninvited. He knocks, yes. He speaks to us through His word, through people, however He pleases. But the one thing He'll never do, is force us to do things against our will. If He was that way, Adam and Eve would have never sinned. They would have had that programmed into them not to do wrong, and without flinching they would have rejected the forbidden fruit. But as we all know, it didn't turn out that way...but as always, God had a plan. Glory to Jesus!

I'll end with this: the next time you think about how awful your life is, or how bad you have it, think it through. Think about the millions of people around the world suffering, people that have it way worse off than you do.

Small children, knowing what starvation is before they know how a real meal tastes, or how to crawl, or laugh on a regular basis

People violently beaten and raped their whole lives without having a say in what goes on in their life, so much to the point where they're numb to the wrong that's being done to them.

I'm sick and tired of the way we complain, having the blessings that we do. Being able to wake up every morning and know that there is food in the fridge, a roof over our head, feeling warm, embraced by safety. I'm tired of people complaining "my life sucks", or "nobody has it as bad as I do". Lemme tell you something, we need to start counting our blessings because sometimes we take for granted how privileged we truly are. Give God thanks that you're alive and well, and if there's something in your life that you feel is truly difficult and you can't take it anymore, congratulations, you get the picture. Let go and let GOD.

"You don't understand" part 1

Of all the words and phrases I hear on a day to day and case by case basis, I must say that the words "you", "don't", and "understand", combined to form the phrase "you don't understand", have to take the cake. Oh, and there's the occasional "nobody understands", which eliminates every man woman and child to ever walk the earth, plus all the other creatures in existence. Now, I have a bone to pick with whoever says this. From personal experience, I can say you're wrong. I know because I was wrong to say that too, God showed me something and I'm about to share it with you.

Here's the thing, GOD knows exactly what you are going through. Look in a mirror, He created you. Look around you, He created it all! God is all-knowing, He knows and understands exactly how you feel and what you're going through. In fact, He knew what you were going to before you went through it, the Word proves it.

⁹remember the former things of old;
for I am God, and there is no other;
I am God, and there is none like me,
¹⁰declaring the end from the beginning
and from ancient times things not yet done,
saying, 'My counsel shall stand,
and I will accomplish all my purpose,'

-Isaiah 46:9-10

In other words, before it happened for us, it already happened in front of God. Remember, He has no time constraints, so He is not limited to a minute, an hour, a second, etc. The Bible says that to God, a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like a day. He exists in eternity, so therefore when a word is spoken through the mouth of God, to us it might not be a reality yet, but it's already in existence in eternity. Maybe I'm getting a little bit ahead of myself here, but that's something that blows my mind just thinking about it.

Now then, where was I? Oh yes, the "nobody understands me" phenomenon. Look, lemme tell you something, you might be right in saying "you don't understand" to someone, because you're probably right. That person probably doesn't understand your exact situation or circumstance, because they're not you. They don't deal with problems the way you do, their emotions don't manifest in the way yours do, and they might not have as short of a temper as you do, or they might not have had the same upbringing as you.

My response? SO WHAT. So what if nobody understands you? So what if your parents abandoned you? So what if you feel like you have the whole weight of the world on your shoulders and no one to help you? So what if nobody wants to be your boyfriend or girlfriend? SO WHAT? So what if your friends leave you hanging or mock you? SO WHAT?

When nobody understands you,
GOD understands you.
(Jeremiah 29:11)
If your parents abandoned you,
GOD will pick you up.
(Psalms 27:10)
If you feel like you have the whole weight of the world on your shoulders,
GOD carries it all.
(Isaiah 53:5)
If you don't feel loved,
GOD loves you.
(Romans 5:8)
If your friends leave you hanging,
GOD is always there.
(Joshua 1:9)
If your friends make fun of you,
remember who you serve!
(Galatians 6:7)

to be continued....

Behold

The window to the soul,
The lamp of everything that lies within,
The winding road of things left unsaid
Hopes, goals, dreams,
Recounted with but a glance
Happiness, joy, peace
Swing sets. . .
Chuck E. Cheese,
A far away land
Driving for hours,
Tears.
Needles
Spoons, forks, knives
Homemade meals,
A new pair of shoes
People, places, faces
Words and phrases
Photographs
A moment
Running, running, running,
Fingernails,
Dirty socks
Bubblewand
Summer days
Sidewalk chalk
Front steps, doorbell
Television,
Imagination
Together again,
Together at last
Break the chains, melt them away
How can He help you today?

Moderately distraught

Why is it that we spend so much time pointing other people's faults out, when we don't even know the situation that they're in? How come we're quick to point others out when they mess up or fall into sin, and then when they do repent in front of God and try to recuperate from their mess, we still doubt that there's been a change? Why is it that we're able to make excuses for ourselves and say "I'm not perfect", yet when others are genuinely trying to succeed in Christ and walk according to His will, we stick our feet out with our hypocritical expressions of self righteousness, via the instruments that are supposed to bring God praise: our mouths and our words. I think that sometimes we forget about the pit of despair that the Lord has set us free from, hence why a lot of us have been in the same place for years, wandering in circles, not being sure of where we started nor where we're going.

For this reason, I firmly believe that God permits us to fall, mess up, or be insulted by somebody, so that we recognize ourselves. Let me explain that again, I think that God lets us mess up so that we recognize that we are not perfect. He permits us to fall so that we recognize that we are just as much a sinner as the people who surround us, and He teaches us humility through quarrels, when people tell us things like "you think you're better than everyone else", or "you have favorites". Sometimes we get angry when someone hurts us, it's not a good feeling to get called out like that; but it's necessary! It helps us think "wow, is that true? Is that really the attitude that I'm portraying?" And in that situation, we are able to kneel in God's presence and say "wow, I'm sorry Lord, I don't wanna be like this, this person said that I act this way but I don't see it. . .change me, God!!" See? It humbles us. We recognize the error of our ways!

Sometimes we think "wow people talk a lot", but we have to change our mentality. Instead of saying they talk a lot we have to think "Lord, am I giving them a reason to talk?" We need to use every situation as an opportunity to step closer to God, regardless of what people say. People will always have something to say, but are you giving them the material? It's not about saying "I don't care" and proceeding in our pride and arrogance, it's about recognizing, reflecting, and renewing our minds as Paul says in Romans 12:2.

Those who believe, those who have been washed in the blood of the Lamb, we are all one body, one Spirit, one Faith, one Baptism, and we serve one God! Through Christ Jesus, we are all family, we are all soldiers in the army of the Lord. Why would you want to kill your family with the vile and despicable things that you have to say? You're destroying a part of you! Why would an infantryman turn his rifle on his brother? He'd be destroying himself, reducing the chance he has for victory in battle!!

My brothers and sisters, we are a team. Can we step back from our opinions of everyone else, just for a moment, to think about what our purpose is on this earth? And if we can't remember, maybe it's time we all just get on our knees and ask God.

"Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall."
-1 Corinthians 10:12.

"Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think any thing as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God. . ."
- 2 Corinthians 3:5

"But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord."
-2 Corinthians 3:18

The Lord is looking for genuine, humble people. People who recognize that God is love (1John 4:8), and want to be full of His presence, meaning be full of His love. We are all here to help each other out, but there is a fine line between helping and hindering. If you think someone is in the wrong, pray for them. There is not one thing hidden in the darkness that has not come to light. And if they are in sin, pray so that God may have mercy on their soul, so that they may repent from their ways and be able to serve God. It is not His will that anyone should perish, but that they may come to repentance through Christ Jesus. THAT is why He sent His son to die for us, and that is why we are still here.

The same way God had mercy on you and me, God can have mercy on others. He is God, remember, we're not in charge here. I could go on about this topic, but I'll leave it here for now. God bless!